Showing posts with label Guideline. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Guideline. Show all posts

Monday, February 2, 2009

Free Tips to a Happy Relationship

The old saying goes “It takes two to tango” could not be truer today. Relationships survive when two people both pull in the same direction, working together in harmony. A one sided relationship is bound to fail. Sometimes it’s the little things that can make a big difference
1. Make sure the time you spend together is quality time. You can each have your own space, but plan on setting aside some time each week to do things together. Set up some ground rules from the start. make a plan and stick to the plan.
2. Make a compromise at the onset of the relationship, you’ll watch the big game with him on Sunday but he has to watch a movie with you on Saturday night. Stay flexible and offer a little give and take.

3. When you first fall in love, in your own mind, the other person is entirely void of defects. Don’t lose that all important feeling. The same defects will still be there years from now, always remember, the person you originally fell in love with. Don’t try to make them into something that wasn’t there in the beginning.
4. Couples battle over many things during their time together. The biggest argument producer of all is family finances. Rest assured you are not alone in your situation, even millionaires have financial problems. Work out a budget from the onset and stick to it. Build a little family time into it. Popcorn and a movie at home will save a whole lot more money than a trip to the local movie house.
5. Arguments are a part of every relationship, it’s how you handle them that is the key. Name calling can form a lasting hurt and may come back to haunt you. My mate and I resolved years ago to never go to bed angry insuring that we would never wake up angry. Most arguments are petty in nature and can wreak havoc on relationships.
6. Keep the lines of communication open at all times. Don’t just hear what your partner is saying. LISTEN to what is being said. Keep your emotions in check and weigh both side of the argument.
7. Keep your sex life interesting at all times, ask your partner what turns them on. Sex doesn’t have to be the same old boring position all the time. They say variety is the spice of life, and no where is it more important than in the bedroom.
8. Make it a point from the beginning, you need time alone and they in turn get theirs. Relationships can be choked to death by one partner clinging to and not allowing the other a little space of their own. Happy balances can be easily attained.
9. Forgiving a partner for infidelity can be one of the hardest things in life to cope with. Only you will know the amount of emotional hurt that will be involved in your own situation. Only after all avenues have been tested will you be able to make that decision. Trust is broken far to easy, and is extremely hard, but not impossible to gain back.
10. When all attempts at reconciliation have failed, it may be time to seek the help of a professional. Seeking help from others isn’t a sign of weakness and may just show that you both are looking seriously at reconciliation. Face the facts, relationships are tough. It takes total commitment from both parties. If you truly want to achieve a happy relationship it is conceivable and achievable but you must first and foremost truly want it to be successful
These are only my thoughts on keeping a relationship together, garnered from many years of a successful and happy relationship.

Monday, December 29, 2008

Free 4 Tips for Keeping Good Online Conversation Going with Women

When you make contact with an interesting woman online, you want to keep the communication going. Some people have a hard time knowing what to say and how to make sure that the exchanges remain interesting.
The main goal is to find a common interest or something that you both can agree upon. This could be any kind of interest, cars, exercise, family, school, the list could go on forever. From there you just need to keep communicating with her, with the intention of keeping the affinity high between the two of you.
Here are four tips that will help you accomplish that.
1. Read her profile. Get a feel for who she is, what she likes, what she does not like. Try to find something you have in common with her or something about her that interests you and makes you curious.
Women like to talk about whatever is their passion. If you can pinpoint what she really likes and just question her about it, she will be more than happy to keep exchanging emails with you and telling you what she thinks.
If you have the same interests, that's even better. Then you can tell her your own thoughts. At that moment, you've got two people exchanging ideas about something they both like, which certainly will keep the conversation going and also will increase the affinity between the two of you.
2. Express opinions that both of you can agree with. When you begin to exchange messages with a woman, it is not a good idea to express opinions that you know she might not agree with. Since she does not know you yet, she might like you a little less for it and may not feel as strong a connection with you. For this reason, she might not reply to your messages.
For example, if you are a smoker, you might want to wait a bit before you talk to her about it. Some women are turned off by smokers. If you tell her before you have found some interests or similarities between the two of you, she might not want to pursue things further. However, if you communicate with her and she begins to like you, then she might not mind and may keep talking to you even when she finds out you are a smoker.
Take another example: If you find out from her profile that she is a vegetarian, you might want to wait a bit before you tell her how much you like your meat cooked rare.
This does not mean that your opinions cannot differ from hers, but as you begin getting to know her, you want to keep the attraction between you as positive as possible. One way to do this is to keep talking about opinions that she can agree with.
3. Be positive. Negativity turns women off, more so if you have just begun interacting with her. When you first start communicating, you want to be positive. For example, don't start to tell her how much you hate cheaters, smokers, or people who are not punctual. Even if she agrees, she might not like the negative attitude you take when expressing your opinion.
There are always ways to turn your negativity into an equivalent opinion that is positive. For example, instead of expressing how much you hate and are frustrated by cheaters, or how angry you would be if someone cheated on you, talk to her about all the positive points of having a faithful relationship.
4. Make it easy for her to reply. After you compose your message, read it again and make sure it will be easy for her to reply to you. To do this, add several questions that will encourage her to write back.
The goal when you begin to communicate with a woman online is to create an attraction. You want her to like you, and you also want to like her.
One way to do this is to find something about her that you will interest you to hear about, or something that both of you will enjoy talking about. From there, you just keep exchanging thoughts with her while keeping things positive. Be sure to make it easy for her to "talk" to you, and you are on your way to making many friends on the Internet.

Online Dating: Free 6 Tips for Picking an Attractive Nickname

A nickname is an alias you use on dating websites to identify yourself to other members. All other members in the chat room and exchanging email with you will know you by that nickname, at least at first. Your nickname represents you throughout the website.
For this reason, you should spend some time choosing a good one. Here are six tips for men who want to choose a nickname that is attractive in women's eyes.
1. Do not choose something about sex. You will not attract women by picking a nickname about sex. You will basically just be wasting your time. Things like "Bob_69U" are a no-no.
2. Do not choose something violent. Do not choose anything that hints at any kind of hatred or violence. There is no room on dating websites for that sort of thing anyway, and women are not looking for people who talk about violence or hatred.
3. Do not choose something negative. Negativity is not attractive to women, or to anyone for that matter. Women just don't respond well to negativity, and if she's a woman who does, then you might not want to be in a relationship with her anyway.
4. Do choose something that describes you. Take some time to think about who you are. Ask your friends what they like about you. Look at yourself through someone else's eyes. Use that information to pick a nickname.
For example, if you are an airplane pilot, you could choose "AutoPilot." If you like to run marathons, you could choose "ActiveRunner."
5. Do choose something that you are looking for. If you are looking to raise a family, you could choose something like "FamilyGuy." Think about what you want in life and what kind of women you like. What qualities and values are you looking for? Write them down on a piece of paper, then use them to inspire your nickname.
6. Do be creative. Spend some time finding a nickname that is unique. If your nickname is already taken and you need to put a number at the end to be able to use it, then it is probably not original enough.
"BlueEyes," "BrownHair," or "TallMan" are all descriptive but not unique, they will not help you to stand out. If you want to highlight your height, for example, you could choose "ColossalAtHeart." If environmental issues are important to you, you could pick "BlueEarth."
What's important about choosing your nickname is to find a benign term that has something to do with you. Spend some time brainstorming. Write on a piece of paper all ideas that come to mind, whether they are good, bad, stupid, funny, or dull, until you find one that really makes you think, "OK, that's the one."
Having a good nickname on a dating website might not sound like the most important thing, but it does represent you right from the start. If you are serious about finding a good woman for a long-term relationship or even for a casual date, you should spend the time required to make it happen. You have to choose a nickname anyway, so you might as well do it right.
I remember having a woman tell me that the reason she emailed a man was because of his nickname. That's how they started their online relationship, by becoming friends after a conversation about the name he chose.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Friendfinder - Online Dating Site Review

Friendfinder has a different take on many sites by being quite inventive and moving with the times as the Internet evolves and how people interact with the Internet and through the Internet changes with this evolution.
Not only does Friendfinder keep up with emerging trends but it has a larger range of relationships to choose from when selecting those you wish to hook up with including friendship, dating, serious relationships people looking for marriage and more.
The crux of Friendfinders success however lies in it’s user interaction where their evolution comes from feedback from members via blogs, polls, questionnaires and so forth which fits in with the current social networking phenomenon which Friendfinder has very much become. This makes it a site worthy of keeping memberships with to expand not only your dating chances but social networks as well!
Features:
Free trial allows you to make a profile and view other profiles like a full member.
Profiles have large amounts of data you can include from ethnicity to religion to education & much more.
Social networking information.
Gay, lesbian, heterosexual and bisexual aspects are covered.
Looking for includes: Friendship, dating, serious relationship, marriage, pen pals, activity partners and more.
On site chat & webcam chat.
Covers regions all over the world.
Profiles are checked before being allowed to go live reducing fake profiles.
Companion online dating magazine.
Create your own and view others blogs hosted on the friendfinder site.
Matchmaking service that shows you new additions that match your profile.
Cost:
As has been mentioned joining is free but to be able to communicate at all with other members you must upgrade to a full account. This turns some people away but the ones that will actually spend money on this service will be a better chance at a good date anyhow! Since you can check out the profiles before you pay you can also assess whether you want to make this commitment. Interestingly you can pay a small amount more to allow free trial members to communicate with you if you choose. There are also two types of memberships: gold and silver.
Gold means your profile will be given priority in searches increasing your chance of being spotted and hasall the advantages of a silver membership which gives you full access to the site with all communication options and also puts you above regular non-paying members on the searches.
Membership Costs:
Silver
1 month for $22.94
3 months for $13.31 per month. Billed in one install for $39.94.
12 months for $8.33 per month. Billed in one install for $99.94.
Gold
1 month for $34.94
3 months for $14.98 per month. Billed in one install for $59.94.
12 months for $7.77 per month, Billed in one install for $139.94.
Negatives:
Very few, some have speculated that the profile checking system is flawed allowing many fake profiles through but this has not put too many off and if you look for other paying members anyway while being a paying member you will usually avoid many of those pitfalls. It’s strength in being diverse can also be a drawback sometimes as there is so much choice of different relationship types some people may find this off-putting.
Conclusion:
Friendfinder is one of the top classed dating sites for it’s ability to move with the times and provide a more personal, interactive and social site than many other dating sites. The inventiveness and amazing attention to detail and extra features means this is one of the few sites well worth getting a membership for as you know new content and updates will be along in time making your experience better and better.

Tips on How to Get My Girlfriend to Trust Me Again

Once bitten, twice shy should be the feeling that your girlfriend is having now. Are you trying to get your girlfriend to trust you again after she found out that you have been unfaithful or lying to her? I know you must be feeling very vexed now because you are serious to change your attitude this time round. It is not easy and it may just take a bit of your time to get your girlfriend to trust you again. Here are some of the simple tips on how to get my girlfriend to trust me again.
- Be patient
You should know being unfaithful is an unacceptable act in any relationship. If you want to know how to get my girlfriend to trust me again, you have to assure her again and again. You just need to be very patient in telling her about your things slowly.
- Be honest all the time
Tell her the truth all the time. Even if you are going out with a girl, let her know or perhaps you should even bring her along to see your friends. As she may have lost her sense of security and trust in you, you should try to put in effort in explaining who you are going out with. At least, you can build the trust again bit by bit.

- Have a clean cut off with the woman that you have an affair with
If you are sincere to learn how to get my girlfriend to trust me again and to be frank, you really need to cut off all your connections with the woman that you have an affair with. Not even calling on the phone. As your girlfriend will become more alert in every of your movement, she may even get paranoid when you talk to her even though you know you have nothing with her anymore but sometimes building a good relationship just does not permits that.
- Be yourself
Be as natural as possible, try not to quarrel over issues about trust anymore. Let her know that you are still the same old guy that she loves.
Being honest in a relationship is the most important criteria to build trust. The proven tactics on How To Get My Girlfriend To Trust Me Again can help to win back her trust again. I am sure you can turn your relationship into a happy and long lasting one soon. I wish you good luck and all the best in your relationship!

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Friendship Day Reunion With Old Friends

The most memorable moment in life is when you meet old friends whom you had lost touch midway in the journey of life. You will be overwhelmed with the feeling of emotional detachment, realizing how much you have been missing him or her all these years. Having them around will remind you of all those golden moments that you spent together in the rain, amidst the morning mist or under the scorching sun. It will remind you of those golden moments of sharing lunch together and exchanging your friendship bands.



Friendship day is just around the corner and you can plan for a grand reunion and arrange for a rocking get together with all your old friends on Friendship Day 2007. Celebrate your reunion with enthusiasm full to the brink. Share all your emotions that you had stored for them for this long span of time. So just go ahead with your plan for celebrating a reunion on this Friendship Day and make the day an unforgettable episode of your life. All you need to do is gather all the contact details of your old friends and kick start the exciting venture.
Collect The Contact Details
This era of technology has made it a lot easier for you to reach out to your lost friends instantly with your plan. Take out some time from your leisure moments and sit with all your old notebooks, dairies and arrangers. Take out all the phone numbers, email addresses, and mailing address of all those golden people whose memories have been haunting you since years. Get the information noted down carefully on a piece of paper.
Contact Them
An amazing way to bring them closer once again after such a long span of time is to send them cute ecards through email wishing them all the good wishes and heart felt love. Remember that every good thing in life begins with love and hope. Always go for any of the free ecard sites. 123greetings.com is one of the most genuine sites that strike my mind at this moment. You can find wondrous assortment of free ecards – animated or non-animated, musical or non-musical that may prove to be the perfect choice for you to embark on such an exciting venture. Do not forget to write briefly about your plan.
You will be amazed to find that the majority of your friends have answered but do not feel depressed, when you find that someone's email ID does not exist. You can make a telephone call and strike him or her with a sudden wonder. Let them know about your plan and be sure that they cannot afford to loose the opportunity of having a great fun with old friends on this Friendship Day.
Pre-Friendship Day meeting
Arrange for a meeting with friends who stays nearby and who would want to take part in the meeting. This is the most vital part of the story. This get together is not for a regular party. Enjoy the day with a friendly meeting and planning for the reunion celebration on the Friendship Day. Share your thought about the celebration and together come up with a solid decision.
Let The Others Know
One more simple step is left yet. When everything has been finalized inform all other friends about the decision that has been taken in the meeting. Inform them about the venue, time and your plan. Now you are almost done.
Stay in touch with your friends and wait for the day to come. It is on the first Sunday of August and hence every single person is anticipated to join this grand reunion party. Keep yourself prepared before hand with your camera loaded and some extra film and a few dry cells.
If you want to surprise your friends on this Friendship Day by giving small gifts to each one of them start planning now and get them prepared, lest you do not make hast at the end and end up things stupidly. Budgeting is an essential part to be considered.

Dating a Victim of Domestic Violence

Her abusive boyfriend from the past cheated, lied, robbed, raped, abused, and misused her. When you first laid eyes on this gorgeous woman, the last thing you thought was you would be inheriting her wounds from yesteryear. Yet, you did and now you feel at times stuck with both his and her mess. You aren't ready to break up with this woman you love, but you can't see a future with her either. So what do you do about this past baggage that tends to show up on days that you think everything is perfectly okay? The following tips should help you get some peace of mind, reach a decision about the relationship, and help you help her to heal.

There is a big difference between a woman who calls herself a victim of domestic violence and one who calls herself a survivor. The survivor most likely has evolved from her experience and shows no signs of having ever been a victim. She has received the support she needed to move on and has taken the necessary changes to live her life to the fullest. However, a victim has not, will not, or doesn't know how to get pass the experience. She may even still call herself, "a victim." Somehow she continues to play the victim in her words and actions with every challenge that comes before her. She hasn't bothered to get the help she needs, and you may be her only counselor.
Women who have been abused don't necessarily get over everything they have gone through in the past. Some of the residue still remains. She may have some strange behaviors that tend to pop up every now and then. If he robbed her, she is possessive about her belongings. If he raped her, then she may have sexual problems. If he choked or smothered her, she may have problems sleeping at night or you touching, staring, or standing over her her while she sleeps. If he lied about his whereabouts a lot, then she will be bothered when you don't say where you are going and how long you will be gone. If he cheated, then she won't trust you when you say "...that woman is just a friend." If he kept her from seeing or talking to family or friends, then she now feels obligated to tell them everything and not pass up an opportunity to attend a family gathering. If he expected her to report to him about everything she does, then she may tell you more than you ever needed or wanted to know or do the complete opposite and appear secretive. If he beat her, then she may flinch if you playfully try to grab her. These are only a small list of some of the things that trigger her misunderstood behaviors.


Nicholl McGuire

Free Guides on Relationships: Empathy Vs. Responsibility For Feelings

William grew up with a mother who was depressed much of her life. As the oldest of three children with a father who was not around much, William took on a lot of responsibility for his mother's wellbeing. He grew up as a kind and caring man, believing that he was responsible for another's feelings, especially a woman's.
Lauren grew up in a family where she received constant criticism from her father. From the time she was little, she had learned to try to do everything right in order to have control over getting her father's approval and avoiding his disapproval. Lauren learned early in life to make others responsible for her feelings.



As so often happens, William and Lauren got together at their common level of woundedness, with William feeling responsible for Lauren's feelings and Lauren making William responsible for her feelings. But it didn't take long for William to feel engulfed by Lauren's demands and to shut down as a way to protect himself from being controlled by her. The more William shut down, the angrier and more demanding Lauren got, and the angrier Lauren got, the more William shut down. Both felt deeply lonely in the relationship, each reacting to the other's wounded self.
As long as William believed he was responsible for Lauren's feelings, he was unable to feel any of his natural caring and empathy for her. And as long as Lauren believed that William was responsible for her feelings, she was unable to feel any of her natural kindness toward him.
The fact is that we cannot feel both empathy toward another and responsibility for their feelings at the same time. We cannot feel empathy for another when we feel burdened by responsibility for their feelings, or when we believe that the other is responsible for our feelings. As long as William continued to believe that he was responsible for Lauren's feelings, all he knew to do was shut down. As long as Lauren believed that William was responsible for her feelings, all she knew to do was get angry and blaming.
Fortunately, William and Lauren were willing to learn and practice Inner Bonding. William did deep work on understanding the sources of his wounded self's belief that he was responsible for Lauren's feelings, and was eventually able to let go of this false belief, as well as learn how to take responsibility for his own feelings when he felt attacked or pulled on by Lauren. As he developed his loving Adult, he was able to take loving care of himself while staying open and caring about Lauren.
Lauren did her own deep Inner Bonding work to finally let go of her long pattern of making others responsible for her feelings. She discovered that her current feelings of abandonment were not because of William at all, but rather because she so often abandoned herself by ignoring her own feelings. She discovered that the moment she made William responsible for her feelings, she felt abandoned because making him responsible for her feelings was an abandonment of herself. As she learned to take loving care of her own feelings, her anger toward William gradually disappeared.
This is the most important work any individual or couple can do to bring about their own happiness and improve all their relationships. Learning to take responsibility for your own feelings and not for another's feelings is vital for your inner peace, joy and loving relationships.

Free Guides on Wedding Location: Where Will You Wed

Where Will You Wed: Selecting a Wedding Location
Prince Charming proposed, and you accepted. Congratulations! When you share your news with friends and family, immediately after congratulating you and your betrothed, they will ask these two questions: When are you going to get married? And where are you going to get married?
It makes a lot more sense to address selecting a wedding location first because weather changes dramatically between the seasons in most places, and once you choose a location, you can then pick the best season to wed there. A good place to start your search is by thinking about the majority of the guests that you will invite.



Do they all live within a 10-mile radius of your hometown? If so, you might want to consider having the wedding close by, so that all your friends and family won't have to shell out big buckaroos to travel to your wedding location.
What if you live a greater distance from most of your family and friends? Perhaps start by thinking about the feasibility of those you care about traveling to your neck of the woods. Can Grandma fly four hours to attend a wedding on the west coast? Will your high school friends be able to spend the money on flights, and have funds left for accommodations, not to mention a wedding gift for you? If many of your guests won't be able to make it to your wedding location, and they all live generally close to one another, you might decide to go ahead and have the hometown ceremony after all.



If you are not marrying your high school sweetheart, it is much more likely that there will be a great deal of variance in terms of where your guests live. In that case, when you are selecting a wedding location, you can consider getting married in a wedding location that has some special significance for you and your sweetie. For instance, maybe you met during college. In that case, the perfect location for you could be the chapel at your alma mater. Or maybe you met your sweetie at the beach, or are both beach lovers. Your dream wedding location could be to wed on a beach. If you are both avid golfers, the best wedding location could be at the ninth hole on a scenic golf course. If you enjoy skiing, consider getting married at a ski lodge, overlooking the mountain.
There is something very special about a destination wedding, as everyone gets to take a min-vacation to someplace they might not ordinarily visit. If you choose a destination wedding for your wedding location, it is customary to provide your guests with some ideas and tips about fun things to do at or near your wedding location. You can even consider sending out this information a few weeks or months ahead of time to assist your guests in their planning process.
Whatever wedding location you choose, consider what season you are most likely to have the best weather. If possible, go ahead and schedule your wedding for that time of year. And enjoy all your wedding location has to offer!

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Do You Love Yourself 100 Percent?

The keyword here is of course the "100 percent". Surprisingly or not surprisingly, most of us do not love our own selves that much.
Over the years I have come across messages relating to loving yourself and all that. But, it really bought home for me this very question when I finished reading a book by Gay Hendricks. It is titled Learning To Love Yourself. Gay is a professor in counseling psychology and a world renowned author, as I come to know.
Back to the question. Why 100 percent is so important, you might ask. Allow me to share my way of understanding it. I am using "we" to mean each and every one of us (including myself of course) to make the points clearer.
We are carrying an invisible bag of rubbish, the "stuff" that we don't like, don't want to talk about, or even think about. It all relates to past experiences back to even our childhood days. It contains anger, hatred, guilt, argument, reprimand, shame, discontent, distrust, malice, and all those bad things. The problem is that this bag of stuff is getting bigger and bigger, and one day it will haunt us big time.
We need to learn to love ourselves live. By first accepting, and then loving the way we are is the only way to liberate ourselves and to give us the peace inside and out. We have to deal with each of these hidden feelings or stuff one by one. Don't suppress it as we usually do. Recognize it, bring it to the open, experience it in your mind, feel it, and accept it, and love yourself even with it. It is kind of like shaking hands with these stuff, and letting go. Bottom-line, we love ourselves as a whole. It is a wholesome love, not selective love. I tried it and I could feel the relief almost immediately.
Everything happens for a reason. The things we encounter, good or bad, all help to mold us. It is part of our growing up. It completes us. Bad things might not be so bad after all if we learn and become wiser.
Love our enemy by starting loving ourselves. When we liberate ourselves by letting go all those negativities, and loving ourselves in a wholesome manner, our mind and heart are in congruency. We are in peace, at ease, and in harmony. We start seeing thing differently. We appreciate life more.
Live life, JuniusWong

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Free Tips on How to Make Him Crazy in Love With You

If there's a special man in your life and you want to make him crazy in love with you, how exactly do you do that? The answer doesn't involve hanging on his every word or altering your life to accommodate his. The truth is that the old standard advice of playing hard to get does have merit, but it needs a new twist to make it really effective.
If you want to make him crazy in love with you, you have to love yourself first. Men are most drawn to confident women who are in control of their emotions. The biggest mistake that women make when they are trying to get their man to love them more is they make themselves completely available both physically and emotionally to him. They let him know, in no uncertain terms, that they love him and would do anything for him. As much as we women love hearing those words from a man. Men aren't as charmed by them. Men are actually less attracted to you if you are right there in his grasp.
Spend more time with friends if you want to make him crazy in love with you. Make him feel as though he's stealing you away from your life. You want him to feel like the hunter that he is. Make it a little challenging for him and he'll be more drawn in. If you aren't always reachable and available he'll crave you more and more.
Let him talk about himself if you want to make him love you more. If you're too self-centered and keep bringing the conversation back to yourself, he's going to be turned off. Men want to feel valued and appreciated so if you want to make him crazy in love with you, ask him about his life. Ask direct questions and hold his gaze when he's talking. This will help him to see that you are completely interested in what's important to him. If you do this he'll find you irresistible.
Specific things you say and do can make a man feel helplessly drawn to you. If you are convinced he is the one there are things you can do to ensure he only has eyes for you. For more insightful tips about understanding men including a way to get him to fall deeply in love with you, visit this Informative Site!

Free Five Love Tips to Save a Rich Partner, Poor Partner Relationship

In some couples the partners have very different finances because one comes from a wealthy family and/or earns much more than the other. They may also have differences in their understanding of finance, budgets, cash flow, or the importance of saving, investing and planning for the future. Plus they usually have deeper issues and anxieties about the symbolic meaning of money. These dynamics can cause conflict and unhappiness. In fact, if these differences are not handled and resolved they can lead to ongoing money battles and even destroy the relationship.Here are five tips on how to break through the differences and come together as a loving team:
Tips
1. Recognize that money has a symbolic meaning.
Money means different things to each of you. It may represent issues of trust, personal and family security, power, freedom or pleasure. If you battle about money and don’t discover what the real concerns are, you and your partner will just keep fighting the same battle over and over again.
2. Discover the issues underlying conflicts about money.
Take turns interviewing each other like a reporter would. Ask your partner about personal needs, wishes, fears and long-term goals. Don’t make any comments, just ask questions and take notes. As you are being interviewed, don’t hold back, speak your truths and dream big.
3. Look for common goals and a shared vision of the future.
Review each other’s lists and look for the commonalities both in terms of fears and long-term goals. You will be surprised at the similarities. No matter how much wealth you have now, you both may be afraid of losing your lifestyle or being cut-off from the family’s wealth and ending up poor. On the other hand, both of you may want a life filled with children or travel and art but are unable to figure out how to create that future. To manifest this vision brainstorm together as a team.
4. Consider a win-win pre- or post-nuptial agreement.
This contract is designed to handle anxieties and fears. It gives assurance to the less-moneyed spouse that his/her needs will be met in the event of divorce or death. A financial agreement calms the fears of the richer partner because he/she will then not be exploited financially in the event of a bitter separation or divorce.
5. Create and agree on a long-term financial plan.
The long-term financial plan will get you to the future vision you both want to create. Many couples need to create a shared budget with his, hers and shared money to help fulfill these personal and common goals. Even if there is no need for the less-moneyed partner to have an income, it is very important for that person to have his/her own bank account and/or a fulfilling activity or career. These steps lead to greater self-esteem and reduce the power imbalance in the couple. For example, the less well-off partner may want to work for a low paying non-profit that is spiritually gratifying, while the other spouse enjoys working as an investment banker or in the family business and supports their lifestyle together.
You can learn much more about negotiating and resolving financial and other thorny love relationship issues in my new book, Love in 90 Days: The Essential Guide to Finding Your Own True Love.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Love : a Killing Game or a Source of Pleasure?

Without energy, there is no life. Without energy, there is only death. Every romantic relationship contains the risk that you start depending on the energy provided by your other half, rather than sourcing your energy yourself. Reflect for a moment on this term: “your other half.” You need not depend on someone else to become a whole person. You can be complete by yourself. You don’t need an “other half” before you can be happy and productive. First learn to be a complete person by yourself. If you’re a woman, learn how to activate your masculine energy, and if you’re a man, activate your feminine energy. Only by balancing yourself and sharing your own completeness can you aspire to make love last forever.
When you depend too much on the energy of your spouse, you will feel the need to possess this person in order to fulfil your daily energy needs. When you’re not able to establish your own energy connection, you will feel the need to control the other in order to receive enough energy to get by. Can you imagine how tragic this is? You have to remain in control of the other person all of the time! One day he might start giving his energy to someone else; then what are you going to do? You would probably collapse, and this you can’t afford, so therefore you have to stay in control. To control is to possess, and in the process you are reducing the other to the level of an object. He or she is no longer seen as a person, but as a “thing to be controlled,” like a toy-car with remote control.
This is no way to live. This is anxiety. This is stress. Most of the time you feel anxious, because you never know exactly what the other is doing. What a waste of energy! If you are so completely focused on the behavior of others, you will never be able to move on with your own life. You are doomed to live a life of fear, trying to control other people, and be ever restless.
In the end you cannot control another person, and so this attitude doesn’t give any rest to your soul. You will be continually subjected to stress, anxiety, sleeplessness, fear, and anger. Every time you feel you are losing control, anger will get a hold of you and you will throw a tantrum in an attempt to gain back control.
What a miserable life! No relationship can withstand this kind of pressure, so it’s bound to collapse and explode in your face. You will end up alone.

Its Not Love Without "HIM"

Awe, look at all the lonely people. It saddens me when I hear from and see so many people who are seeking that love of their lives and can't seem to find what they are looking for. Sometimes they are just alone and seeking to be loved, period. Still, either way, it is so very sad and hard to watch and witness. I've been there myself. I know what it is like to really crave the affection of someone real special in my life. It is HARD being single and searching. The thing is, God is in control of all of that and it takes a whole lot of trust to wait on God with all He has in store for us. We are his hands, voice, feet and often heart as well. We are so much more but that would be a whole other article in itself. When seeking out love, we first have to realize that we have to "be" the love we are looking for first. We only attract into our lives what we offer in life. In the same respect we only attract to us what and who we are. So, in order to find and discover the love and relationships we are seeking out, in essense we need to become them. Let me explain a bit further. If someone who is compassionate is what we are seeking, we must learn to be compassionate. We attract who we are and what we project to others. It is almost like a "secret God code" of human existance but not really such a huge secret! If what we are seeking is a Godlike relationship then what we need to become is more like the one we seek. Becoming more like Jesus is a great way to find a love that is as unconditionally accepting and healing as possible. I think He is the best example of love that there is and certainly the best example of healing. Fashioning ourselves like "HIM" is to set ourselves up for a relationship ordained and blessed by Him. Without Him, love is not love. He is the "Master of Love" and in fact, "is love". To "be" love is to allow love to come through every part of our being. It is like it comes through our pours so much it takes over our whole self. We were fashioned and formed very uniquely, and according to the Bible in the image of our Creator. To be in His image is to be also "love". Keeping the mindset that we are love, will attract love to our lives. Extending love in all of the things we do in life will bring more love toward us, naturally without having to seek it out. Life without love is void. Life without God is void. They are one in the same. So, when thinking of any type of relationship with anyone, He is the main facet that makes it work and worth while. If He is the example we set ourselves to follow then amazing blessed love is what we shall have! It is a promise! Our universe was fashioned very carefully by our Creator and there are certain laws that will never be broken. This is one of them! We become and attract that which we are. So, fashion your lives according to the Lord God almighty and you will have a relationship with God that is closer than ever and a relationship with others that are uncompromised! Our greatest mistake in life is to compromise our faith in God and to settle for less than what we deserve in life. It brings a relationship that is not blessed or sanctified by God and it will end in misery. Please seek ye first the ways of God and of heaven and fashion yourselves according to the love of God and you will attract those into your life who will be blessed by the connection with you and you with them! Your union will be such that "all the waters of heaven and earth could never put out the fire that love creates". Love is like an ever lasting fire that can never be put out. When couples choose this kind of love their relationship will be as everlasting as God is everlasting. Please, whatever you do: never invite a relationship into your life if it does not include "HIM". To do so would create an imbalaced relationship headed for disaster. I, personally, have experienced that kind and don't wish to ever do so again. "God is my refuge and my strength and He is my mercy and my grace. He shall forever be my guide, keeping my face directed onward toward the prize for which God Himself has called me heavenward. I will run the race and run it with precision, and when tested in this world, when I line myself up with Jesus and His love: I will win!" Rev Jenine Miana Please make the statement above your own and pray this prayer with me for the everlasting love you have always desired in relationship with God, with yourself and with others. "Dear Heavenly Father, I have recognized that I am created in Your beautiful image. I am amazed by Your love, Your mercy and Your grace. I am amazed by Your capacity to love me no matter what. I thank You with all my heart for the love You have shown me in my life. Please help me to always look to You for the love I need in my life, always. Please also help me to be that love to others in every way I am able to be. Please connect me with all those who equally are like me, so that my relationships will be equally yoked. I trust you with my heart and so I place it in your capable hands to lead me, guide me, and help me attract the love life of a lifetime! I am blessed that You are a personal God and that You care so deeply about my heart. Please help me to always have a love that includes You so that it will be balanced, complete and satisifying to my soul!" Amen and Amen! If you need assistance with your love decisions or want to talk about the not so great decisions you have made and need release, then please call me anytime! I would be happy to talk with you, walk with you and pray for you through your time of decision. Please remember it is not love without HIM! Please also call if you need to know more about Jesus, his life, his love, his teaching and his ways. I would be happy to introduce you to the "HIM" that keeps the eternal flames of love always lit! 707-688-1277

Saturday, October 4, 2008

Increase your love making

Love is a single word but it carries many deep feelings within itself. These are care, understanding, devotion, dedication, respect for each other, and sense of responsibility thereby making this feeling so powerful and incredible. The feeling of love comes instantly in a person’s heart and it has the power to merge an individual within itself. Love: a four letter word which fills everybody’s heart with smile, happiness and joy. It is a delicate thread which binds two people in such a strong relation. It makes life so beautiful.

Everything around you seems to blossom. Love brings meaning to ones life. It makes you feel special in its own way. You just can’t stop thinking about your beloved. When you are in love you can never be lonely wherever you go. Love is when you want to be with your soul mate every time and everywhere. Love makes each day worth getting up for. It’s magic! It can do wonders. It is the feeling of heart not mind.
You don’t have to go overboard by going to a fancy restaurant every other day or going on vacations that you cannot afford. Mind you those things help but, sometimes the little things that mean the most. Here are five things you can do that will improve your relationship and will allow you to have the best love making experience:
1. Listening
The lack of communication can be very frustrating to women but not listening can really get their dander up. Many men have been accused of concentrating more on whatever was on television than our wives and girlfriends. To a large degree it’s true. Most women like to talk about personal matters that have a direct bearing on their lives, their family or friends. What’s on TV at that time is irrelevant. Show that you appreciate her by listening. Don’t just wait for her to start talking. Initiate the conversation sometimes, and then listen carefully not only to what she says but her body language as well. This is not a one shot deal. Listening to her on a steady basis can only help better your relationship.
2. The Small Occasion Celebration
We’ve all seen the shows where the woman gets upset because the husband forgets their anniversary or birthday. That quite honestly should never happen. However for a lot of women, there are many smaller occasions that mean just as much; for instance the anniversary of your first date or the day both of you bought something together. Being able to surprise your lady with little things that you know mean something to her (something she probably figured you took no notice of) can be a major relationship booster. If you have to “cheat” a little bit then get your own personal journal to keep track of these things.
3. Get to Know her People
Women value their relationships. While many men are of the take it or leave it mentality, it is very important to most women that you get to know her family and friends. These are people who make up a special part of her life and by taking the energy and effort to genuinely get to know them, you are showing her how much you love and care for her. They maybe coming from a perspective that you are not crazy about but hang in there. Be open minded and respectful. The chances are that somewhere down the line you will want her to meet your people. Extend the same courtesies to her family and friends that you would expect from her if the situations were reversed. It’s easy to get stuck in a routine and set in our ways. But it’s most important to continually show the lady of your life that you love her. Again it doesn’t take extravagance. Get to know her people, be mindful of the small big occasions and above all listen. Doing these three things is planting the seeds of long term healthy relationship.
4. Give up Trying to Change the Other Person
The desire to fix or change the other person is one of the biggest mistakes you can make. Plus, it causes power struggles within relationships and issues of control. One person feels she cannot love the other unless the other changes. The other feels hurt, inadequate and as though something is wrong with him. Having a healthy relationship means having the ability to love your partner as they are. Our partners have been put here to grow, develop and discover who they are. This can be a lengthy and challenging process. But the surprising thing about change is that the less we push and disapprove of others, the more easily and naturally they grow and change.
5. Develop Patience
Patience is an old-fashioned word in today’s world. However, there is no way to rush growth in relationships or in the development of joy. If you’re eager to get on the right track, there are two ways to get started: Learn how to be more giving and make an effort to be a better listener. But each one of these tasks takes time to master — and patience. That’s why it is necessary to realize that as we are, right now at this moment, we are lovable and acceptable. If you’re ready to increase the amount of joy you feel in your own relationship, take back the responsibility for finding joy in your life, you will be pleased at the results.

Saturday, August 2, 2008

Over Rowing this Boat will Sink your Relationship!

Are you attracting the love that you want from your current relationship or are you trying to control your relationship by over rowing the boat! You know, many of us try and control everything in our lives, and our relationship is no exception. OK, name me one thing in your life right now that can't be changed or whisked away in the blink of an eye! You can't can you? So, why is that we frantically attempt to control our relationship? Does this really give you the love affection and romance that you desire, or is it only making your partner resentful, angry, and more distant? How often do you try to control your relationship by helping or rescuing your partner without being asked to do so? And, how often does it result in an unappreciative slap in the face? If this is the case then you may be over rowing the boat! Ironically, doing too much for your partner sends a signal of desperation and a lack of self-confidence which results in undermining the emotional bonds of your relationship. So, when I state that over rowing the boat will sink your relationship; I am speaking the unequivocal truth!” Frequently, these issues of self-esteem and low confidence are at the root of many failing relationships, and when they are left unchecked end disastrously.
Remember, the whole premise of a relationship is to share your life with someone, not control theirs! Your partner needs to feel good about him or her self. In essence they need to be their own person!! You are in this together, and if they need help or need to be rescued they will ask for it!! So, try and relinquish your control and surrender! The following examples can help guide you in the appropriate direction, but to make these changes on a permanent level you must get to the bottom of restoring your self-esteem and confidence levels.
Don't help unless they ask you to help
Don't offer a solution unless asked for one.
Don't rescue them from a situation unless you are asked to.
Don't do everything for your mate.
Do listen and be understanding
Do some self reflection and learn to completely love yourself.
Do complement your partner in a way that allows them to be the person they are.
Remember, to attract what you want from your partner you must become the very thing you wish to attract!!!
For more information on how to save and transform your relationship subscribe to my free e-Guide “The secret principles to Saving a Relationship”
Save relationship
Best wishes,
David Roppo
”The Relationship Rehab
Coach”

Life is a Mirror

Think about this: I’m a boisterous person and I’m over the top. A woman who is shy and quiet might be intrigued by me, but the thought of hanging out with me for longer than ten minutes would probably drive her nuts. She wouldn’t want to do it because I’m way too hyperactive and crazy.
But for you, as someone who is shy – which many people are – you’re going to attract another person who is shy. You, as a shy person, are not going to approach a Type A woman, because she will intimidate the hell out of you. You’re not ready for that.
But what you are ready for is women who have mannerisms like you; women who are quiet like you. You have to find yourself.
And a lot of women are like that – I would say at least 70% of women are shy, so you have a lot of women to choose from! If you start talking to the women that are also shy, you’ll realize that when you think your heart is beating a million beats per minute and she can see it through your shirt, it’s not! When you feel your lip quivering when you try to smile, she’s feeling the exact same way!
You both are basically mirror reflections of each other. If you keep that in mind, and realize that this woman that you’re attempting to talk to right now is as equally as shy as you, you’re going to realize how much you have in common.
You could even say to her – and I’ve told guys this often – if you’re talking to a woman in a coffee shop, you could say to her, “man, it’s so nice talking to you, I never really talk to people in public.”
You can say the things that are on your mind, and she’ll respond, “oh my god, I’m the same way! I feel the same way!” So don’t be so afraid to let yourself out. You’ll start gradually increasing your confidence, and the women you start attracting will be gradually more and more confident.
This is not to say that the women that are shy and not yet that confident are not amazing – because you’re a good guy, you’d be a great boyfriend in a relationship – probably much better than me. You’d be more loyal, more loving, and more appreciative – just because you’ve struggled more with this thing.
You don’t have the bigger-better mentality that I’ve had – where I think, hey, she’s hot, but I could go get hotter. You’ll be more like, she’s really cool, I really like her, and she’s sweet.
And remember what we talked about – when you’re the good guy (which many of us are) you need to make sure you read up on sex and kick ass in bed, and this woman is going to be thinking, I’ve got the best guy in the world! She’ll think you’re a bad boy, just because you’re good in bed.
So realize that everything is a reflection. You’re attracted to a certain type of woman that is just like you. We all are.
Patrick: You’ll also find that the whole mirror thing works both ways. Not only when you are nervous, she’s nervous too, but if you are calm, even if she was nervous, you’re inducing her to be calm with you. Your presence can make everyone around you come down to earth too.
David: Yeah, do you remember when I said that you have a very calming presence? When you let go and you smile, you are really engaging and warm. When you were smiling at the clothing store and on the beach, you were so calm. People feel safe and comfortable around you.
As I told you, one of your tasks is to download the Jason story in your Blackberry. Every time you see a woman and you get nervous, just read it. You heard the analogy we were talking about earlier – if you’re ever nervous in any type of social situation, just download the Jason story from American Airlines and read it. Then you’ll realize that you could have spent the weekend with a guy who was lying naked across three seats on an American Airlines flight!
That last part may have confused some of you. Google naked guy on an American Airlines flight and have a good laugh.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Where to Go on a First Date



Where To Go On A First Date

Way to go, dude! You've got that first date with the girl you've been watching for a while. So where do you go from here? Oh, man! Where do you take her?

No worries. She said yes to the first date, so she's already willing to get to know you better. With this in mind, go someplace that's fun, upbeat, and enjoyable for both of you.

Here's a few ideas that you can choose from.

An open-air date. There's something cool about going on a date where you're both out in the sunshine and fresh air. Most girls like being active. You don't have to play football with your date to be active. Try going to the zoo, park or beach. Play some miniature golf or go to a carnival or fair. These dates let you both have fun and give you some room to talk without feeling too intimate for either one of you.

Like drama or music? Go to concert or a theatre date. You don't have to spend a lot of money for either one of these. You can go to an open-air concert in the park, a local theatre company production, or just listen to the band at a friendly bar. Again, these will give you the chance to talk and get to know each other better.

If you like something a little more sophisticated go to an art exhibition or a museum. Like something a little unusual, hit the arcade, go to a theme park or water park; shop for antiques at flea markets. Then after any of these places, stop for a coffee or cappuccino. The point isn't where you go, or what activity you enjoy. The point is getting to know each other. There was obviously something that attracted you to each other. Take the time to enjoy being around each other and talking together. After all, the best relationships begin as friendships.

Watch FREE hidden camera pickup videos and discover how to approach, meet and get dates with attractive women at the shopping mall, the park, even the street!

Friday, July 11, 2008

How To Find Love


When I was a younger person I thought that I knew everything about life!. Like most of us I had no idea about life or love or the journey. It used to mystify me when people would talk about finding love and how they couldn’t find it. I was always in love and never had a problem. It wasn’t until I got older that I realized what I had found was nothing to do with love.
As we get older and we become more and more cynical we often find that it is actually a very difficult thing to find love, well what is actual love anyway? . Many of us mistake lust and love anyway and often end up finding that we have found lust and not found love at all.
With the advent of the Internet and so many different ways to find things its not surprising that the Internet is being used by more and more people to find love. Its convenient and it gives you a chance to actually check out who you think meet certain criteria that we have, without actually having to go to all the expense of going out to eternally search.
I have always been of the belief that if you really want something you actually have to do something about it. Are you just sitting at home? Do you think that the person of your dreams is just about to ring the doorbell? Well all I can say is stop kidding yourself because that is no way to find your true love in this modern era.
In the past 5 years I used to try and find love by aimlessly going to bars and clubs trying to meet people. It just wasn’t worth it the venues were always noisy and there was so many distractions that it was almost impossible to actually meet people so I gave up.
I have been on more dates in the last year than I had on the previous 4 years simply because I changed my focus and decided that if I was going to find love I could do it a lot more easily from looking on the internet than I could by going to crowded bars and clubs trying to get phone numbers etc. It is so much simpler than all the rubbish you get when you go to the clubbing scene.
I have met some of the most wonderful people recently by just trying on the Internet. It wasn’t that hard, simply because you get to search for people you want to meet and decide who you make contact with. Then you can open channels of conversation and hopefully meet and see how things go. If you are shy it’s a great place to start.
My advice to anyone is that if what you are doing at the moment isn’t helping you to find love then you obviously need to change what you are doing. I hope that you get to find that person, as it’s the most rewarding thing that anyone can find in life.
About the Author
C S Liner is a professional writer for Find Love a website dedicated to helping people in today's harsh dating environment for more tips and Ideas visit findlove.com.au.

Monday, July 7, 2008

How to Fix a Relationship - 3 Fool-Proof Ways

Many people, both young and old today are in relationships. And of course, having couple squabbles are part and parcel of being in one. So, being able to manage them effectively will help to develop the relationship and bring both partners closer together. Conversely, tiffs that escalate into big quarrels may risk having the couple breaking up. So, if your relationship is on the rocks, you need to know how to fix a relationship. The way you manage your relationship and its problems indicate to your partner how capable you are in handling matters, so it is important that you know these techniques by heart!
Giving enough personal time and space in the relationship
You should always allow for some healthy distance apart and alone time away from each other. This is critical to developing a healthy relationship with your partner as alone time is necessary to allow you to think about yourself, your goals in life and your future together. This applies to your partner as well. You’ll need to leave sufficient room in your schedule to fit in the other important things in your life, such as your hobbies and friends. So, when you are having troubles in your relationship, understand that you should avoid rushing things and pushing your other half to get what you want. Instead, take a step back and give space for him or her to think about and access what he or she wants. Then plan together as a couple how you can mend the relationship.
Moving on with your life
If your relationship has taken a turn for the worst, the best thing you can do next is to live your life in a better way that it previously was. For instance, if your ex had controlled the way your dress or what you ate, just be who you are and release your inner self now. Wear what you like and eat the food that you crave and be happy. Live life the way you want and show him or her how happy you can be. By doing so, you will be able to let your ex know and better understand the person she or he had fallen in love with. After all, not living life the way you want could be one of the reasons why there was a strain in your relationship in the first place. So, putting up an assertive front enables you to prove to your ex that you are strong and emotionally stable. Such a quality is very attractive, and will cause your partner seriously think twice before letting you go.
Making an effort to improve the relationship
If you do feel that there are strong feelings between you and your partner, then you should definitely invest substantial time and energy to make the relationship work. Develop ways in which you and your partner can better improve the situation. It takes two hands to clap, so you need to communicate and have honest conversations with your partner. Do not rush into agreeing to everything just so that you can get back together. Instead, just be your true. Try your best to forgive each other and to accept each others’ flaws.
There are many ways in which you can get back together with your ex. These 3 fool proof ways are effective techniques that you can use to fix yours, so use them well!
About the Author
Colin Strouse is an authority on Relationship Management providing valuable advice at getyourexbackyesterday.com where you can learn how to get an ex back.